The comment section is on fire. Loving the conversation happening here.
In regard to writing for our audience, would I be able to sum it up and say: when I am writing I'm considering how people may feel as I write the words that I'm writing.
Alex, this is great! I love how you've paid attention over the course of your writing, and evolved as you learned. I do have two questions/comments.
1. I just posted a Substack Note saying that most people don't remember what day or time you post—the opposite of what you're saying here! But I did qualify that devoted readers who await your post each week may actually know when you post. I can attest that I do not know when even my most favorite writers post. I just read them when I see them. I always keep an eye on the Substack inbox, so I don't have to read something as soon as it comes out; I can read it when I have time.
2. I love the idea of writing not for metrics but to engage, to feed your readers with what they've come to expect from you. And it is awesome that you listened and heard this insight. My one reserve here is that I don't think about what my readers want AT ALL when I write. I'm like a sculptor; I carve what I see in my mind and then those that are drawn to those particular lines stop to have a look. So, it's just a 'cart before the horse' thing; my readers have subscribed because they like how I think and how I express my thoughts. So the relationship is the same—one of deep care and engagement—but I don't have to worry when I'm writing if I've departed from what my readers want.
To be clear; I'm commenting because this is such a wonderfully smart and insightful post, and I wanted to get those two things off my chest and also to say thank you for sharing this, Alex!
It’s an interesting and subtle point, my friend. (I’m talking about the second point; thinking about your reader as you write). And I think it’s possible we’re thinking of two different things and that we actually agree on this point.
One bit of writers’ craft advice that has always stayed with me is to respect your reader. Respecting the reader means always being aware of the fact that there IS a reader. To me, that means not boring my reader with rambling words, incoherency, irrelevancies, etc. It means writing as well as I possibly can and being as clear as I possibly can. I think of the reader in that respect all the time. I put myself in the mind of the reader, I send test emails to myself at least a half a dozen times for each essay. When I open my email, I’m reading from a different perspective, feeling how the essay reads to someone who didn’t write it.
So I think what I was really saying in the above comment is that I don’t try to come up with content that I think my reader wants. The content, the ideas, have to be important to me, meaningful to me. They won’t be important and meaningful to every reader, and that just means that my writing is not for them.
I do think of myself as a creative artist, and the creation has to come from within, not without.
That is all I meant, Alexander. 😊
Oh, and I meant to add, that I really appreciate your research!
(and, by the way, I publish every Tuesday morning at 4 AM :-) )
Haha! Yes, my friend, I know you publish at that time. I read your newsletter with my Tuesday coffee ☕️ I am one of YOUR superfans.
I believe we are actually in agreement on that point, then diverging. Because I also accept that not everything I write will resonate with 100% of my audience. And that's okay. There is a reason I am writing the piece I am writing, and I trust that my writing will reach the right people at the right time.
I love the writers' craft advice. I think that is also part of the essence of this that I was trying to communicate, so I appreciate that you added this tidbit of wisdom here. I think it is beautifully articulated. Respect your reader. And part of that is to also respect the autonomy of your reader. They won't always love your writing. But I always appreciate them.
And I'm always so very appreciative of you, my friend, truly. I hope you know that.
Thank you so much, Alexander, you’re so kind. I feel the same way about you. Always happy to see that you’ve published (even if I don’t know what your regular day and time is, lol….hey, I just realized that a big part of that might be my personality; I can never remember my wife’s weekly schedule and she always has to write it down for me. If I come home and she’s not home, I generally I have no idea where she is ha ha).
Hi Don, thank you! And thank you for sharing. So appreciated!
This post is based on my research over the past year, which involved hundreds of readers and users. I'm a researcher after all, and if I'm going to dedicate my time and energy to a platform, I'm going to learn how to use it!
However, it isn't all-inclusive and is certainly just my perspective. I'm definitely not a guru! HAHA! :)
Regarding your point about the posting schedule, it's true that many readers won't remember your specific day and time, but those with whom you build a relationship will. Readers often mention that with their favorite Substacks, they develop a ritual around consuming the writing. Sometimes, that's as simple as reading it while enjoying coffee in the morning, afternoon tea, or on certain evenings. However, they often report that they fit it in on specific days or times because they have come to expect the newsletter then. Even if they don't realize it, that doesn't negate the fact that they've built a habit around consuming the content.
Regarding your point about writing content for you vs. your reader. Definitely. I'm right there with you. I see these as conversations. If writers only write what they want, it is the same as being the person that is the only person talking. And we all know how we feel about those people. :) Just like conversation partners, readers have needs we must consider; otherwise, we take up all the space. I seem to recall a moment in one of your essays from a few months back where you admitted that something you sent out was a bit different from your usual, and you received feedback from some of your readers. That can happen. It’s not necessarily a bad thing — we are the writers. But I disagree with you because, as we are maintaining relationships, we should consider our readers’ needs in our writing.
Thanks, Alex. You confirmed what my gut has been telling me about my online presence, and it is a relief to know that the way I show up here and elsewhere really is about intention, meaningful connection, and personal relationships. That's always been important to me, and I can see more clearly how the rhythm of consistency really is about the relationship between me and my readers as real people.
Thank you, Jeannie. I so appreciate you sharing that! I think rhythm and consistency is a very critical part of the puzzle to so many of our readers. We don't get that type of experience often, anymore.
Yes Jeannie! I love this. Relationship is a two-way street, and part of that two-way is showing up. There is a neuroscience behind showing up consistently as a means of providing safety and security in a relationship. I personally prefer relationships that are first and foremost SAFE. There is also a neuroscience behind relationships being two-ways. We bring to our readers who and what we have to offer, and we listen to our readers about what they want and we share who and what we have to offer that matches what they are telling us they need. this is relationship.
Yes! Teri Leigh, now you put into words something I instinctively knew, and have always known as a child, and it’s that consistency demonstrates SAFETY in relationships. I so appreciate that perspective you shared here today. It makes so much sense, given the intermittent attention I was given in childhood and the insecure attachment that resulted from that. I’ve always valued showing up, as I say I will do, unless there is a dire emergency.
Okay, this is crazy Don! Because I was just about to ask questions and post something along the same lines!
Alex, this was such a beautiful and a nuanced post! Really fired up my brain and made me think. Because I've a feeling this comment could become an essay...I'm just putting my thoughts in points lol 😅:
- thank you for saying that about open rates, and comments. I felt a deep relief. I will accept that I keep checking for open rates... though reducing the quality of depth causes so much friction for me. I got really exhausted of reducing the depth....so I finally am who I am, even in notes and that's so relieving! You're absolutely right, the deep connections have just become more beautiful ❤️
- w.r.t consistency...here's where I had a tiny friction and would love to hear your 2 cents if it's okay. I typically end up posting about 3-4 times a months consistently... though again, having a consistent 'schedule' again causes deep friction because of how my creativity ebbs and flows in waves. If the reader knows that I'll publish 3-4 times a month consistently, how important is it for them to know the day and time? And how can I find some sense of balance if it's so?
- Again as Don said, I've stopped writing "for the audience". I write from the creativity, soul, heart first...and then edit it for the people reading it...but then it means polishing or just formatting.
(Well, it became an essay anyways😂...but thank you so much for this essay Alex! Ooofff! I can't wait for the notes one yet!)
P.S.: if you could do a piece about how to invite your subscribers into your paid products/spaces...with the balance, nuance and heart... it'd be really helpful. Because people like me... who're trying to find the middle...put themselves out there, while also not completely hide themselves from 'selling'...it becomes a tough job to find the middle lol.
There is neuroscience behind the consistency piece. The human brain and nervous system really likes consistency, reliability, familiarity. It's why places like McDs and Starbucks are so successful because people know what to expect and when to expect it. There's a safety, a security, a stability, and a reliability that comes with consistency. Even if we don't consciously know or pay attention to when someone posts, our brains do. We may not realize it, but our brains really do prefer the newsletters we know we can rely on to be there on a certain day even if we don't plan to show up and read them on that day every time. This lends to the conversation about relationship. We feel safest and most supported and most engaged in relationships where we know the people will be there, doing what they say when they say they will.
Many creators struggle with this because creativity doesn't work on a timeline or a structure necessarily. However, there is a piece of showing up for your art, even when you don't feel the "spark" that helps you to develop a consistent reliable relationship with your art. I learned this when I played piano as a kid. I didn't like practicing every day for 30 minutes, but when I did, the times when I did get inspired I had a much better experience than if I only showed up when I was inspired. the bursts of inspiration didn't happen as often or for as long. relationship, no matter whether it is with a person or a pratice, thrives on consistency...show up in the good days AND the bad days. this also helps you to stop trying to be "perfect" or "inspired" with every post. trust me, your audience likes the mundane posts as much as the inspired ones. sometimes more.
as for writing "for the audience" I think there is an important piece to consider here. If you are publishing, making things public, this implies a RELATIONSHIP, and relationship is two-way. it's not just about you putting out what you want to put out, but relationship is about engaging two-ways. You bring what you have to offer AND you meet your audience where they are at. I personally think that to write only what you want to write and not think about your audience at all is a bit off the mark because you are engaging with others. and others implies relationship and anyone in relationship wants a two-way engagement. If I'm only writing for myself and what I solely want to write without thinking of my audience, I might as well just journal and not publish. It would be like a lecturer just talking AT the audience without paying attention to how they are receiving what s/he is saying. They are likely to lose a large chunk of that audience when they don't pay attention to whether the audience is understanding the language they are speaking.
I got long-winded here. but I think you get my drift.
Thank you so so so much Teri! You've given me a lot to think about for sure🥹💜. Ooooffff this itself can be a whole thing isn't it?? Just talking about these aspects i mean
Teri has provided a really amazing response, but I'll share the part that I shared with Don regarding considering your "audience." Here is what I shared with Don, slightly edited:
"Regarding your point about writing content for you vs. your reader. Definitely. I'm right there with you. I see these as conversations. If writers only write what they want, it is the same as being the person that is the only person talking. And we all know how we feel about those people. :) Just like conversation partners, readers have needs we must consider; otherwise, we take up all the space. But I disagree with you because, as we are maintaining relationships, we should consider our readers’ needs in our writing."
Ultimately, keep writing for the creativity, soul, and heart first. Considering your audience doesn't actually change it. My challenge to you? Why would considering your audience change writing with creativity, soul, and heart? I don't believe it would. Because I think we form relationships based on creativity, soul, and heart. And if that is the case, we certainly could also bring that same relational energy here too.
The comment section is on fire. Loving the conversation happening here.
In regard to writing for our audience, would I be able to sum it up and say: when I am writing I'm considering how people may feel as I write the words that I'm writing.
Is that congruent with what you are saying?
Alex, this is great! I love how you've paid attention over the course of your writing, and evolved as you learned. I do have two questions/comments.
1. I just posted a Substack Note saying that most people don't remember what day or time you post—the opposite of what you're saying here! But I did qualify that devoted readers who await your post each week may actually know when you post. I can attest that I do not know when even my most favorite writers post. I just read them when I see them. I always keep an eye on the Substack inbox, so I don't have to read something as soon as it comes out; I can read it when I have time.
2. I love the idea of writing not for metrics but to engage, to feed your readers with what they've come to expect from you. And it is awesome that you listened and heard this insight. My one reserve here is that I don't think about what my readers want AT ALL when I write. I'm like a sculptor; I carve what I see in my mind and then those that are drawn to those particular lines stop to have a look. So, it's just a 'cart before the horse' thing; my readers have subscribed because they like how I think and how I express my thoughts. So the relationship is the same—one of deep care and engagement—but I don't have to worry when I'm writing if I've departed from what my readers want.
To be clear; I'm commenting because this is such a wonderfully smart and insightful post, and I wanted to get those two things off my chest and also to say thank you for sharing this, Alex!
It’s an interesting and subtle point, my friend. (I’m talking about the second point; thinking about your reader as you write). And I think it’s possible we’re thinking of two different things and that we actually agree on this point.
One bit of writers’ craft advice that has always stayed with me is to respect your reader. Respecting the reader means always being aware of the fact that there IS a reader. To me, that means not boring my reader with rambling words, incoherency, irrelevancies, etc. It means writing as well as I possibly can and being as clear as I possibly can. I think of the reader in that respect all the time. I put myself in the mind of the reader, I send test emails to myself at least a half a dozen times for each essay. When I open my email, I’m reading from a different perspective, feeling how the essay reads to someone who didn’t write it.
So I think what I was really saying in the above comment is that I don’t try to come up with content that I think my reader wants. The content, the ideas, have to be important to me, meaningful to me. They won’t be important and meaningful to every reader, and that just means that my writing is not for them.
I do think of myself as a creative artist, and the creation has to come from within, not without.
That is all I meant, Alexander. 😊
Oh, and I meant to add, that I really appreciate your research!
(and, by the way, I publish every Tuesday morning at 4 AM :-) )
Haha! Yes, my friend, I know you publish at that time. I read your newsletter with my Tuesday coffee ☕️ I am one of YOUR superfans.
I believe we are actually in agreement on that point, then diverging. Because I also accept that not everything I write will resonate with 100% of my audience. And that's okay. There is a reason I am writing the piece I am writing, and I trust that my writing will reach the right people at the right time.
I love the writers' craft advice. I think that is also part of the essence of this that I was trying to communicate, so I appreciate that you added this tidbit of wisdom here. I think it is beautifully articulated. Respect your reader. And part of that is to also respect the autonomy of your reader. They won't always love your writing. But I always appreciate them.
And I'm always so very appreciative of you, my friend, truly. I hope you know that.
Thank you so much, Alexander, you’re so kind. I feel the same way about you. Always happy to see that you’ve published (even if I don’t know what your regular day and time is, lol….hey, I just realized that a big part of that might be my personality; I can never remember my wife’s weekly schedule and she always has to write it down for me. If I come home and she’s not home, I generally I have no idea where she is ha ha).
Hi Don, thank you! And thank you for sharing. So appreciated!
This post is based on my research over the past year, which involved hundreds of readers and users. I'm a researcher after all, and if I'm going to dedicate my time and energy to a platform, I'm going to learn how to use it!
However, it isn't all-inclusive and is certainly just my perspective. I'm definitely not a guru! HAHA! :)
Regarding your point about the posting schedule, it's true that many readers won't remember your specific day and time, but those with whom you build a relationship will. Readers often mention that with their favorite Substacks, they develop a ritual around consuming the writing. Sometimes, that's as simple as reading it while enjoying coffee in the morning, afternoon tea, or on certain evenings. However, they often report that they fit it in on specific days or times because they have come to expect the newsletter then. Even if they don't realize it, that doesn't negate the fact that they've built a habit around consuming the content.
Regarding your point about writing content for you vs. your reader. Definitely. I'm right there with you. I see these as conversations. If writers only write what they want, it is the same as being the person that is the only person talking. And we all know how we feel about those people. :) Just like conversation partners, readers have needs we must consider; otherwise, we take up all the space. I seem to recall a moment in one of your essays from a few months back where you admitted that something you sent out was a bit different from your usual, and you received feedback from some of your readers. That can happen. It’s not necessarily a bad thing — we are the writers. But I disagree with you because, as we are maintaining relationships, we should consider our readers’ needs in our writing.
Thanks, Alex. You confirmed what my gut has been telling me about my online presence, and it is a relief to know that the way I show up here and elsewhere really is about intention, meaningful connection, and personal relationships. That's always been important to me, and I can see more clearly how the rhythm of consistency really is about the relationship between me and my readers as real people.
Thank you, Jeannie. I so appreciate you sharing that! I think rhythm and consistency is a very critical part of the puzzle to so many of our readers. We don't get that type of experience often, anymore.
Yes Jeannie! I love this. Relationship is a two-way street, and part of that two-way is showing up. There is a neuroscience behind showing up consistently as a means of providing safety and security in a relationship. I personally prefer relationships that are first and foremost SAFE. There is also a neuroscience behind relationships being two-ways. We bring to our readers who and what we have to offer, and we listen to our readers about what they want and we share who and what we have to offer that matches what they are telling us they need. this is relationship.
Yes! Teri Leigh, now you put into words something I instinctively knew, and have always known as a child, and it’s that consistency demonstrates SAFETY in relationships. I so appreciate that perspective you shared here today. It makes so much sense, given the intermittent attention I was given in childhood and the insecure attachment that resulted from that. I’ve always valued showing up, as I say I will do, unless there is a dire emergency.
Okay, this is crazy Don! Because I was just about to ask questions and post something along the same lines!
Alex, this was such a beautiful and a nuanced post! Really fired up my brain and made me think. Because I've a feeling this comment could become an essay...I'm just putting my thoughts in points lol 😅:
- thank you for saying that about open rates, and comments. I felt a deep relief. I will accept that I keep checking for open rates... though reducing the quality of depth causes so much friction for me. I got really exhausted of reducing the depth....so I finally am who I am, even in notes and that's so relieving! You're absolutely right, the deep connections have just become more beautiful ❤️
- w.r.t consistency...here's where I had a tiny friction and would love to hear your 2 cents if it's okay. I typically end up posting about 3-4 times a months consistently... though again, having a consistent 'schedule' again causes deep friction because of how my creativity ebbs and flows in waves. If the reader knows that I'll publish 3-4 times a month consistently, how important is it for them to know the day and time? And how can I find some sense of balance if it's so?
- Again as Don said, I've stopped writing "for the audience". I write from the creativity, soul, heart first...and then edit it for the people reading it...but then it means polishing or just formatting.
(Well, it became an essay anyways😂...but thank you so much for this essay Alex! Ooofff! I can't wait for the notes one yet!)
P.S.: if you could do a piece about how to invite your subscribers into your paid products/spaces...with the balance, nuance and heart... it'd be really helpful. Because people like me... who're trying to find the middle...put themselves out there, while also not completely hide themselves from 'selling'...it becomes a tough job to find the middle lol.
Shruthi,
There is neuroscience behind the consistency piece. The human brain and nervous system really likes consistency, reliability, familiarity. It's why places like McDs and Starbucks are so successful because people know what to expect and when to expect it. There's a safety, a security, a stability, and a reliability that comes with consistency. Even if we don't consciously know or pay attention to when someone posts, our brains do. We may not realize it, but our brains really do prefer the newsletters we know we can rely on to be there on a certain day even if we don't plan to show up and read them on that day every time. This lends to the conversation about relationship. We feel safest and most supported and most engaged in relationships where we know the people will be there, doing what they say when they say they will.
Many creators struggle with this because creativity doesn't work on a timeline or a structure necessarily. However, there is a piece of showing up for your art, even when you don't feel the "spark" that helps you to develop a consistent reliable relationship with your art. I learned this when I played piano as a kid. I didn't like practicing every day for 30 minutes, but when I did, the times when I did get inspired I had a much better experience than if I only showed up when I was inspired. the bursts of inspiration didn't happen as often or for as long. relationship, no matter whether it is with a person or a pratice, thrives on consistency...show up in the good days AND the bad days. this also helps you to stop trying to be "perfect" or "inspired" with every post. trust me, your audience likes the mundane posts as much as the inspired ones. sometimes more.
as for writing "for the audience" I think there is an important piece to consider here. If you are publishing, making things public, this implies a RELATIONSHIP, and relationship is two-way. it's not just about you putting out what you want to put out, but relationship is about engaging two-ways. You bring what you have to offer AND you meet your audience where they are at. I personally think that to write only what you want to write and not think about your audience at all is a bit off the mark because you are engaging with others. and others implies relationship and anyone in relationship wants a two-way engagement. If I'm only writing for myself and what I solely want to write without thinking of my audience, I might as well just journal and not publish. It would be like a lecturer just talking AT the audience without paying attention to how they are receiving what s/he is saying. They are likely to lose a large chunk of that audience when they don't pay attention to whether the audience is understanding the language they are speaking.
I got long-winded here. but I think you get my drift.
Thank you so so so much Teri! You've given me a lot to think about for sure🥹💜. Ooooffff this itself can be a whole thing isn't it?? Just talking about these aspects i mean
Hi Shruthi!
Teri has provided a really amazing response, but I'll share the part that I shared with Don regarding considering your "audience." Here is what I shared with Don, slightly edited:
"Regarding your point about writing content for you vs. your reader. Definitely. I'm right there with you. I see these as conversations. If writers only write what they want, it is the same as being the person that is the only person talking. And we all know how we feel about those people. :) Just like conversation partners, readers have needs we must consider; otherwise, we take up all the space. But I disagree with you because, as we are maintaining relationships, we should consider our readers’ needs in our writing."
Ultimately, keep writing for the creativity, soul, and heart first. Considering your audience doesn't actually change it. My challenge to you? Why would considering your audience change writing with creativity, soul, and heart? I don't believe it would. Because I think we form relationships based on creativity, soul, and heart. And if that is the case, we certainly could also bring that same relational energy here too.
This is interesting stuff and echos some of my thoughts too thanks Alex
Thank you! I appreciate you!!